Hello! Have you ever had times in life where you want to hit pause on a few things? Those who know me know that I typically function quite efficiently when I have many balls in the air. This is just my personality and has probably been further enhanced over the years through being surrounded by a family of over-achievers! "Try hard, best you can" was something that my Grandpa Neizmik said to me so many times. This is my default approach to the things that I do. We have just entered our 2nd year of homeschooling. Last year we began our home school adventure with my daughter who was then in 1st grade. Our son attended preschool three mornings per week. This year we are homeschooling both kids for grades K and 2nd. I had been thinking that we would begin next week. Last Tuesday my daughter unexpectedly asked at bedtime if we could please begin this year in the morning? And so we did! In the words of my friend Jaime, we have begun with a "tapered start". Not every day since Day 1 has been a documented school day. Yesterday we had morning appointments and then went to the beach! We are chipping away at our 180 days... Today I arrived at what should have been a fairly obvious realization. I can not continue to do everything that I have done over the summer while simultaneously homeschooling two kids!
I am a country girl at heart. When I see a photo like the one above, it embodies the things that I long to do with my life. We currently live on 1/4 acre in Millcreek Township which is located in Erie, PA. Our neighborhood is not exactly the country. My husband is NOT a country person. If he were, I could see us already living a bit farther out than we do right now! On the flip side, being 5-10 minutes from pretty much everything is a huge convenience in our everyday life. I love our current home and am thankful for it each day. Yet so often I find myself yearning for a more simple life. Much of this is a state of being as opposed to a physical address that one calls home. I do not want to be a hurried person who is frequently stretched thin. I want my kids to have access to more of me. I do need to be a working mom in order to balance the family budget and I am super thankful to have a job that allows me to work from home!
When I look at my "time budget" on paper, it really should all work out fine. But just like with finances and unexpected expenses, there are potential unexpected "expenses" when it comes to the time I give to several areas. The biggest potential pitfall for me comes when something is taking up too much space in my thoughts! Where are the margins? I am going to have to audit myself and begin to make some cuts around here. I will also need to step up my time management skills!
Remembering that I have added a large new component to my schedule through beginning a new year of homeschooling, some other areas will have to be minimized. Otherwise I will try to do it all well and this is what sets me on a tricky course! This is what causes me to be overwhelmed, snappy and drained. At that moment I am ready to pick up everything and head to that cabin in the middle of nowhere! Sometimes I think that I could be a really great mom if I spent less time with other things. Other times I realize that if I were focused solely on motherhood 100% of my time, I would definitely lose my marbles! I am wired in a way that I thrive while engaged in several things much of the time. There has got to be a balance.
I have to return to John 15 over and over again. These are the words of life. Without this perspective, I am a mess!
John 15:1-12 (NLT, emphasis mine) “I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more. You have already been pruned and purified by the message I have given you. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.
“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers. Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned. But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted! When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples. This brings great glory to my Father.
“I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love. When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. Yes, your joy will overflow! This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you."
There is a song that I just love.... it gets me every time! There is a line that says "There's no place that we can't find peace" and "this is why it's to You we run". Check out Crowder's I Am.
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